A Blogger Blogging about Google+... That's Original

Ah, social networking: the greatest time suck invented since the television. Most of us remember Myspace and how very unique and popular we felt as our friends perused our carefully constructed pages filled with lists of things we liked and a background choice that, no doubt, took more careful consideration than our majors in college. Then there was facebook: streamlined, elitist and, at times, a logistically confusing site that we weren’t so keen to jump into at first.

Then we found out there were mafias, farms and witty bumper stickers so we sailed on over like pilgrims to the new world!

While Myspace took a nose dive, it’s still the place to be if you are an up-and-coming musician too cheap to actually pay for advertising. You can spam other up and coming musicians who will have no choice other than to spam you back. Honestly, I imagine Myspace as a land full of people with low social skills and way too much time on their hands… or hipsters. But I repeat myself.

Facebook is still the place to be. Everyone and their grandmother has a facebook. Trust me. I found that out when I made a double penetration joke and gave a bit of a shock to a friend's granny who was trying to keep up with the times. Even if you aren’t all that into 'Zuckerberg’s famous pig,' you pretty much have to have one to keep up with non-web-based times. Everyone sends evites through facebook now. If you don’t check your inbox, you may find your social calendar severely bare.

Past all the in-depth social media, there’s Twitter. Personally, I think Twitter is more marketing scheme, in the Myspace vein, than it is connection based fun. This is what happens when I go to Twitter.

1. Sign in because I’m so frakin tired of some celebrity pimpin some bullshit, that I can’t stand it anymore. I follow you because I want to feel a deeper human connection when you talk about scarfing down a Whopper, I do not give a shit about the 8,000 charities you are trying to advertise for so that you don’t feel bad about not actually giving them time or money.

2. Ooooooo more celebrities I love! Follow five more douche bags that I’m just going to have to delete later.

3. Charlie Sheen!!!!!!!!!!!!

4. Get excited for the first few texts, then get annoyed because they’re not actually from people I want to be texted by.

5. Vomit expletives every time text message tone chimes.

6. Talk about cancelling Twitter account.

7. Start back at 1.

I’m fairly certain it’s the cyber equivalent of an abusive relationship, but whatever. Now we need to get to the meat of the article: Google+.

First, let me start by saying that I’m not thrilled with the name because it requires me to use the ‘+’ symbol. That requires me to pres ‘shift’ and super extend my right pinky, inevitably missing the right key every time, and I really just can’t be bothered.

I would have much preferred GooglePlus, or GoogleU, or WeAreMothafuckinGoogleThereforeYouWillBowDownAndUseOurShit.

You’ll notice none of my suggestions require the stroking of a number key and are obviously superior due to that very fact.

Past that, I’m still working on loving Google+. There are quite a few things I like about it, but those are sometimes overshadowed by the things I either completely dislike or don’t get. Here are some things I dig about the Plus.

1. It is a nice little mixture of facebook and Twitter. Celebrities are already posting away and some of them even avoid sucking; Wil Wheaton specifically.

2. The privacy posting aspect is pretty awesome. You put people in certain bubbles, much like how you already compartmentalize them in your brain, and you can choose which bubble sees what. So if you are a fan of the drunk posting, be thankful that the family bubble isn’t on default and your mom won’t find out about the orgy you just hosted. (It’s just an example people… I hate hosting.)

3. Though there is an aspect to it that comes off as busy, navigating through the different filters really does give you a sense of control over what you want to do and see on the site. Sometimes you really just want to get a fast update from one particular group of friends. Other times, you want to waste away the seconds of your life while waiting for the coffee to finish brewing. Google+ makes this pretty simple.

4. It’s Google. Call me a fangirl if you want and then go Bing ‘Fuck off.’

5. The ‘Sparks’ are a nice touch. This little sidebar is like a bookmark for all the latest news on the shit you dig. A very cool feature and much more approachable than the bullshit updates facebook tried to pull off.

The biggest struggle for Google+ right now (besides their fucking name) is going live and getting more people on. Right now the interaction is severely lacking even if you’re a geek and have already made your way in. Fixing those kinks is going to be monumental too.

One of my friends found that every picture he’d ever sent via Gmail had posted to his photo section.

I found that all of my blog photos had done the same.

It’s little default stuff like this that can turn someone away in a heartbeat simply by opening their eyes to the massive amounts of info Google has on us. Images of Big Brother almost bombard the mind when you realize just how connected your business is to this massive corporation.

Past that there are the obvious bugs that are going to appear in a fledgling endeavor. Links don’t post correctly. Movies have sound, but no picture. Little mundane shit that should be expected, given that we are still in the testing stage.

Something that really bugged me though was the unknown aspect of exactly what happens when you put someone in your circles. Do they know you put them in your circle? If they don’t have an invite did they get one? Can they see which circle you put them in? Because I’m starting to get a little clever with the names of my circles and I’m not sure I want everyone to know where they are. And obviously I'm not the only one. Look what I found on Redditt.

These things will come with time, but Google needs to be a little more clear about just how public it’s users are being. Because sometimes… I don’t have a clue.

Will I continue to use Google+? Absolutely.

Do I anticipate it killing off my facebook addiction? I highly doubt it. But if you’re a social media junkie (AKA You have a desk job) come on over to Google+ and put me in your circle.

Ewww. Maybe the ‘+’ wasn’t the only linguistic misstep those crazy geniuses had.